And then there are those that are completely devoid of common sense.

I just read a story that a grifter at British Columbia’s Saanich Fair used a fake contest to mine personal information from unsuspecting folks eager to win the free trip to Las Vegas. A free trip for filling out an entry form with a so-called travel agency? Seems reasonabily legit, right? What if I told you that this free trip was a cruise to Las Vegas?

I know that Miss Teen South Carolina believes that many “US americans” struggle with geography because the “don’t have access to maps” but maybe Canada Canadians struggle with this same issue. You know… because Las Vegas is land-locked and in a desert.

I’m a big Packer fan and all this ONGOING Favre drama has really gotten me down on pro football. But, hey, it can’t get any worse, right? WRONG.

Today, I just discovered that the NFL commissioner Rodger Goodell has implemented a code of conduct policy for fans attending games this year. Did you miss it? I said a code of conduct policy “for FANS.”

Yep, the NFL is going to take all the fun out of protect it’s fans from:

• Drunkenness and signs of alcohol impairment that result in irresponsible behavior.
• Foul or abusive language or obscene gestures.
• Interference with the progress of the game (including throwing objects on the field).
• Failing to follow instructions of stadium personnel.
• Verbal or physical harassment of opposing team fans.

Alcohol impairment? Abusive language? Harrassing opposing teams? Whaaaaaaa?… that doesn’t sound like football to me… oh wait, that sounds EXACTLY like it. And guess what happens if you participate in such activities? Well, expect to be kicked out and/or have your season tickets revoked.

I know that games are played on Sundays but are they being played in churches now? Hell no! So where’s the obscenity and violence that made this game great?

Now it’s not that easy for me to find tickets so this probably doesn’t affect me that much but how is this gonna affect the Eagles home games. I mean, they booed Santa Claus for shit’s sake… what are their home games gonna look like if they’re banning druken idiots?

Alright so an Eagles fan cheap-shot aside, this is absolute bull shit! So you’re telling me that I can’t pay over $75.00 to go to an NFL game, get drunk, yell obscenities and flip off millionaire drug dealers, wife beaters and Adam Jones? Hi, pot, I’m kettle.

I think Yahoo and their advertisers need to get on the same page. So… does college pay or not?

Guess what’s “high on the list” for republican Texas delegate, Robert Hurt? If you guessed removing artwork that depicts boobies and wee-wees from public view then you’ve just won yourself a shiny quarter*.

Returning from a trip to Washington DC, he told DallasNews.com that he was appalled by the “Nude women, sculptured women” that he witnessed in our nation’s capital. Continuing, “You possibly don’t have nude art in your living rooms. So why is it important to have that in the common places of Washington, D.C.?”

And if this guy didn’t give us enough ammo already he also served up an example of this illicity by pointing out that on the Arlington Memorial Bridge “There are two Lady Godivas, two women on horses with no shirt on and long hair.” (One of which is shown on the right with naughty parts covered with photos of non-threatening artist, Rick Astley.)

First off, why is this news?

Secondly, with an upcoming election, ongoing war and a recession, why the hell would anybody remoted involved in politics claim that art censorship is high on their list?

Finally… wait, no, not finally… thanks, Bob, for reaffirming why I’m a liberal democrat.

*You didn’t actually think I was serious about that quarter, did you? Sorry for getting your hopes up… I just needed to use that expression to finish that intro. I would totally hook you up but it would be really tough to do from a logistical standpoint. Plus, arent’t stamps like 42 cents now? That wouldn’t be cost effective for sending a quarter. How about I just give you a firm pat on the back when I see you next? Cool?”

I have a new hero and his name is Avi Oslick.

It all started when Avi wrote a check and shortly thereafter called Bank of American to ask them to cancel it. He says that the bank originally confirmed that the check was cancelled but later it cleared, Avi was down $2,500 and the bank told him that there was nothing that could be done.

Avi told NBC 10 that he spoke to the bank to try to resolve the matter by saying:

“Listen, you know, if you guys don’t work with me on this issue, you know, I’m just going to tell everyone how much I hate the bank.”

And since he’s a man of his word that’s exactly what he did. He posted a 1′ x 10′ sign on his house reading “I HATE BANK OF AMERICA.”

Right now you’re probably thinking “Wow, that’s pretty badass,” and you’d be right but you haven’t heard anything yet.

Avi wanted the world wide web to know that he hates Bank of American too so he created iHateBOA.com (the site is “dedicated to why Bank Of America sucks so much”) and on that site he exlains:

[Bank of America] called the police.The police asked if it was my house, my wall and if I would take it down. I said Yes, Yes and NO. They said… sounds good to me. So I added a bigger sign.. one that made more of an impact. 2 feet high by 20 feet long

So… a police visit to his house inspires him to double the size of his sign? That’s just vintage Avi.

I doubt that I need to explain further why he’s my hero. I did’t think so.

So… I just found an article on APP.com about a New Jersey school that was locked-down because a local librarian called 911 to report a ninja running through the woods.

Turns out this “ninja” was actually a camp counselor headed to a costume party!

Two things:

1. How hilarious must that 911 call have been? If you are the dispatcher that received that call and you are reading this post I *beg you* to leak that tape on youtube.
2. And what was that llibrarian thinking? Obviously that wasn’t a real ninja because everyone knows that you can’t see real ninjas (see picture above). Seriously, he or she needs to get their ass in the “n” section and learn about ninjas.